Sleep deprived

Spending 3 days in a raw sleep deprived is something all mothers know and faced at least once in their motherhood life. This week I spent 3 days sleep deprived and I had to do all my daily routine in the morning like if I had a long sleep. The first ay at noon I felt like a roller coaster spinning in my head, after a couple cups of coffee I managed to stop it for a while, and I continued the day with the  help of  Panadol. At night I tried hopefully to sleep but my baby was a lot stronger than me and kept me awake for the second night, that at some point I started to break down and cried for her mercy to let me sleep for a whole hour without calling for me, but no response. The next day I was totally out of myself, I wasn't hungry I didn't want to eat, I wanted a big mug of caffeine. At night I had to take my older children to their sports training at the club, and you can't imagine what it is to drive with sleep deprivation!!! You have either to options, one is to drive at 20 km/hr and be insulted by everyone in the street, or drive faster but with no reaction and risking to have an accident. In our way to the club I decided to take the safer approach and trying not to pay attention o people's insults. But in our way back home I was longing to the bed, I decided to pray and drive faster wishing nothing appears in front of me till I reach home. Thank God for his protection, but I entered my house with no nerves that night. I begged my kids not to say a word and to go to sleep as I was already sleeping with eyes wide open. I prayed a lot that my twin kids won't woke up during the night and to let me sleep for 4 continuous hours, that was all I wished for.  And God heard my prayers and I slept :) 

My daughter

Sitting here in almost the same spot in the club every day, just to watch my daughter in her swimming training. I'm so proud of her, even though I appear tough and I'm sure she thinks so, but I am proud of her progress. I love watching her in her trainings and I do care a lot. I know sometimes I can be tough but because of my love I try to teach her to be responsible and strong. I try to teach her that life is not easy and she has to struggle and do her best to achieve and earn her own success. I'm sure she doesn't understand the lesson now, but I hope one day she'll remember and be thankfull. I don't want her to be hurt, I know that's an inevitable destiny but I try to do my best. I want her to face problems with courage and encounter problems with her own strengths. I want to teach her all the lessons I have learnt, and built a stonger personality than mine. I want her to be more than I have ever been. 

Ramadan

Ramadan is a very spiritual month, but with kids I don't have this luxury of  going to the mosque to pray everyday. But i decided that at least I can have the time to recite from Quran. I try to have half an hour each day for me with Allah. Kids can not approach my bedroom during this time.
My older kids are starting fasting, this year. My girl is fasting till Maghreb, we told the boy that he can fast till Assr but most of the days he fasted  with us and he is so proud of himself.
They also started to pray all the prayers and the best thing that they try to pray in Gama'a and their little siblings are praying with them .
They are growing and started to feel the spiritual moral of Ramadan. They started to ask questions, very interesting questions about Islam and Allah and Ramadan.  I even heard my girl telling her brother that Allah told us to fast to train our body and soul to deprive it from all bad things not only food and to feel the suffer of the poor people and hunger.
I'm so glad of their progresses and the challenge they are encountering and their decisiveness to start fasting the whole day in this hot Summer and even going to their sports training.
May God protects them and bless them.

Facing life with Hydrocephalus

As I mentioned before my little boy has a medical condition called" Hydrocephalus", 99% of the people don't know anything about it, even us before him we never knew about it.
We decided to apply for our lovely twins in their siblings' school, for preschool class, but we faced something we've never thought it would happen from educated people. The minute the school manager knew that he has a medical condition and that he has a valve in his head connecting  a tube from his brain to his abdominal, she got that face we know when people hear about his condition that says " Is he retarded?" then she decided that he could not be admitted to the school. Why? That's it, the school can't accept such a condition!!! Why? He's a totally normal boy! No sorry! My husband tried a lot with her till he convinced her to get reports from both his NS and Pediatric confirming that he's normal and doesn't need any special treatment. And she decided that she will transfer his file to the French manager, it's a french system school. And we agreed.
We got all the reports needed and came back to a meeting with the french manager, he was a real gentleman and caring person, he begun with " here's my signature I accept him but i only want to know more of his medical condition." The difference between his way of thinking and talking and egyptians ways are sooooo different. He read the reports, he even talked to his pediatrician over the phone, he was so calm and nice.
When he got into the class i met his teacher and i get a long talk with her regarding his condition, and

she re-asked all the questions i already answered. But she also got that face of " is he retarded?" But she asked it in a different way. She asked if he will ever need a shadow teacher. And I told her No. The last day in school, she told me that he is a very lovely child, he's so smart and caring. And she told me , and I felt it was a reply to herself " don't let anyone tells you that your son has any comprehensive problem, he is a totally normal boy thank God."

Now i'm thinking of enrolling them in sports trainings, i started to talk with some trainer, and as usual when they hear about his condition they got this face of " is he retarded?" And sometimes they even ask it directly, and then they get afraid of dealing with him. They say it's a responsibility we can not    bear!

I have to explain his condition to every teacher he will ever get, every trainer. Every person who will ever interact with him all through his life.

All I'm thinking now of is, if  me a grown up can't convince well educated grown ups that my son has a medical condition but he is not retarded nor need a special treatment, how would he be able to deal with it his whole life?
People always assume that having a brain problem means retarded or need special treatment. But his condition, Thank God, is not, he only needs that people around him knows how to interact with him in a safer way.

I know this blog is not funny, but life isn't always.